I used to have some very self-destructive manners growing into my artistry. One way I have been self-sabotaging my own artistry is
destroying my music/art/work of creations.
Now, I think there are always cycles we go through, questioning our relationship to why we do what we do. This still doesn't have turn out into poisonous self-sabotage. I have thrown drawings to bin, left them outside to rot (that's real abandonment :D), deleted musical projects from my computer etc.
It makes me a little sad to think that I have actually destroyed some pieces I made that I just was unsure of. There's lots of musical ideas, drawings, writings that I have thrown to the bin because I got somehow really ashamed of them. They weren't good enough, I couldn't approve them, I thought they were just shit. There were moments when I would be so mixed and confused inside, feeling even self-hate and loathing, that I just couldn't bear being with my art. I couldn't perceive it from a loving perspective.
Later on, when the mixed feelings associated with creative birthing (which actually can be silenced and changed when the process is well-balanced) calmed down, after YEARS even, I would now be really happy to go back to those works. There were many ideas I would be able to develop now.
What ever you're working on now and it doesn't seem to go as you'd like - does not mean that you wouldn't be able to execute it later on when time travels.
There is a certain aspect to art and creativity where we have to be humble and respectful to the rhythm of creation. Some things cook for a longer time. Our job is to learn to take care of the cycle so that we can collect the fruits when they are ripe. Forcing only destroys the gentle dynamics of creative expression and flow.
A few things you CAN do in those moments of wanting to rip everything apart:
1. Become an observer.
When there is an art piece that doesn't feel good enough, detach your personality and sense of self from it by looking it from an outside opinion. Ask yourself, what are the things that work here? What doesn't? If I really listen to myself, can I notice what made this feel like a "failure" to me? Can I take the good ideas in here and develop them further? What does this piece evoke in me?
2. Observe your emotions
What are the emotions that your work unleashes in you? Start breathing into them and ask what do they have to tell you. Our art actually carries messages from our deep knowing. Usually wanting to destroy our art is lack of self-worthiness and love. What ever you feel is totally allowed. When you begin to listen to those emotions you automatically start taking care of yourself. The next question from there on would be "what do I need to feel worthy and loved?".
3. Archive your works
Highly recommended. Just archive your s*it somewhere so that your future self can have good time looking at it. If nothing else, you can see the journey you make, which is really important for us to actually track our progress. Even if you don't know NOW what to do with what you created, you really might know in some months or years. Believe me, I say this with personal experience.
4. Let go of expectations
Wow, this is huge one. Actually our deeply laid expectations make a big impact on feeling not-good-enough with our creations. We maybe expect it to look/sound/feel/taste/whatever similar to this or that artist, a teacher, a colleague, a piece you made in your past, list goes on. The expectations we make is the source of deep unhappiness and unsatisfaction. It is a paradox. When we stop waiting for certain outcomes and the process to go in a certain way, it starts to work in genius ways. So, let go of expectations, both your own and others.
5. Notice what you did well and move on
Just state out loud all the things you did great. Maybe you used colors well or your technique was great. Maybe you realized something about yourself. Maybe you received new ideas. And then - move on. Stop pushing or trying. If you need to take a break and distance yourself, then do it. If you need to work on something else, do it. If you need to cry, do it. Maybe you want to take another go. Let the answer reveal itself to you.